I’m An Asshole by Denis Leary
You know what I’m gonna do?
I’m gonna get myself a 1967 Cadilac El Dorado Convertable - Hot pink! With whale skin hub caps, all leather cow interior, & big brown baby seal eyes for headlights, YEAH!
I’m gonna drive around in that baby at 115 miles per hour, getting one mile per gallon, sucking down Quarter Pounder cheeseburgers from McDonalds in the old-fashioned non-biodegradable Styrofoam containers.
And when I’m done sucking down those grease-ball burgers, I’m gonna wipe my mouth with the American flag; & then I’m gonna toss the Styrofoam containers right out the side.
And there ain’t a Goddamn thing anybody can do about it.
